New girl in the city. Well, after staying for more than 2 years in a city, I dont have the right to call myself new at all. But 'comparitively new girl in the city' won't suit at all.
Life is unexpected, and funny as well. I was 18 when I first visited this place with my parents. My dad was posted here for some months for an official assignment and we all came here for a short vaccation. Thats when I, oops, me and my mom, we both developed love for this city. Still remember those Tambram streets, that air force camp and that playground where my brother and me used to play cricket with other kids. That market where my mom used to go everyday to get flowers and stuff. Those T Nagar ice cream we used to bing on.
Even remember that sunday evening when we all were sitting at Marina beach where I could see a beautiful tall building. The beach and the building sparkling like diamond with those electrifing lights looked marvelous and charming altogether. And thats when I wished deep inside 'GOD! I MUST work here someday'.
Work for me was something else at that point of time. Not the kind of work I am doing right now :P I had plans of joining an NGO and then doing things for the betterment of society. Though, nothing has changed much even now. Thanks to 'Avvaya homes', a small group of educated people running orphanage and old-age home in Chennai. They are like a home away from home. Dreams will definately come true. I am just in that phase of empowering myself for some 2-3 years so that I can empower others later on.
But well, it was then, when that feel of being independent striked me somewhere. I was always more or less a dependent KIND OF kid since childhood. 'Kind of' because I was independent with my acts but permissions were granted from higher authorities - Maa & Paa ;) Not by choice though. Rather, it was more or less a need because of my dad's job and his posting in remote areas like Kashmir, Assam etc that made me and brother more of scheilded kids and my mom, an overprotective parent. Quite natural in a place where life started with al qaida and ended with hijbul mujahiddin :D
But the point is, at that point of time, when I was sitting @ the sea shore dreaming of my independence, somehow, Mr. GOD, for the first time in life, took my words, well really seriously. And here I am, in Besant Nagar: a suburb area of CHENNAI, named after one of the important members of Indian National Congress, Annie Besant. And well, this place has a beautiful beach n opposite to that is my flat, where I am writing this blog, less for others and more for myself. Well I have no clue about the audience of my blogs except one dedicated reader..Nishi :) n 2nd one..me n myself ;)
So, as I wished for some independence, it came to me, but with every good thing, comes the worst part hand in hand. Homesickness: especially when you are just too attached to your family, cooking food on your own, cleaning house, working , studying..as in everything on your own, is not as great as it appeals initially. There were times when I was directioneless, frustrated and told my parents to search a guy so that I can settle down. Then woke up my subconcious mind and asked if that is what I wanted from life. Being a techie is good but websites and newspapaers should not decide who is going to stand besides you in your good and bad times. And then said my concious mind, give time, things will change with time and I will get the one who is destined to be mine.
But life here is tough. real tough. And the worst part, you can not always show your loneliness to your parents, because once told, they will be much more worried than you are about it. Even though my parents will make sure to call me n number of times.
But still
at times, you need that warmth of your parent's touch and hug
at times, you need your siblings to irritate you for those small lil things
at times, you need your grand parents to talk to you for a while about their life
And at times, you even need those chit chat silly stupid friends to gossip around
P.S: How could i forget home cooked food btw :P I need so much of it. I can not cook anymore just for myself now :(
at times, you need that warmth of your parent's touch and hug
at times, you need your siblings to irritate you for those small lil things
at times, you need your grand parents to talk to you for a while about their life
And at times, you even need those chit chat silly stupid friends to gossip around
P.S: How could i forget home cooked food btw :P I need so much of it. I can not cook anymore just for myself now :(
And I miss every bit of it.
Though this place has given more than I ever asked for and taught me a lot about life. Though I definately love this city and the people here, more than my native. And though, for me, now its among one of the beautiful cities of the world, still, home is home. And I miss home. And on days when there are cyclones and chores.like today..I get scared and I miss my parents so much more :(
P.S: Nishi, Thanks for being a kind, patient and a true friend. And genuinely, thanks for tolerating me and my blogs. Waiting for your comments ;)
