Money comes at a cost !

Hi. I see a good no of hits on my blogs now a days. And that surely motivates me to write more. And yes, I have a new dedicated reader, Nithya Selvi...a very good friend and a colleague, who is one such motivation ... Thanks Nithya :)

So, here I am :)) Confused about what to write and how to start. Have a vague idea but well, as usual, miss the right direction. Things have changed with time. My grand pa's favorite line. He will still remember how his salary was only some few rupees some 60 years back. And how they used to be so happy with whatever they used to get.

I completely agree. Infact, I always feel that the number of rooms in your house is inversely proportional to the happiness your life has. Well, may be because I know how it is to stay in a 1 room or 2 room house and still be happy about things in life :) Life is fun that way.

A small government quarter, with two small rooms, a big aangan, humid wet ceilings, fans running at the speed of a turtle and four of us. Heaven. Life was so well and organised. My brother and me would decide everyday to sleep in our own room, we will go, and start those scary ghost stories, and within one hour or so, whole colony will hear a sound 'BHAAAAGOOOO' and there we run, without looking anywhere else..straight to our parent's room. Finally, see, i told you, with four of us together,  life is heaven :))

Monday to friday, we had a proper time table, sticked near out study table . And both of us would religiously 'TRY TO' follow it ;) Saturday, we had to complete all our homework by evening. And then family time :) and there comes the D day. Sunday, no studies :) My dad beleived that there has to be a day without studies to recharge you for the week ahead. Sunday was a family/friends day. Either it was a family outing or I used to organise picnics with colony friends ( my dad still calls me Union leader :D ) So, we would dress up early morning, tell mom to prepare some good stuff, carry our bags and bottles and off for picnic :) I used to ride the cycle and my brother sitting behind was the one who used to give directions and keep a watch on the dogs ;) I was horrible with roads. I still am. Thanks to my defected eyes :D Nithya, if you are reading this, m sure you will agree on this part ;)

 Well , I just realised that I am going directionless again. But the point is, today, its different. Life today is mechanical. I come back from office, i cook,  i eat, i study, i sleep. I wake up. and follow the same routine. Oh yes, btw, how did i forget, i facebook in b/w. I am a facebook addict, but can't help, thats the only thing that keeps me connected to the happenings which i otherwise miss. Even if its my friend's wedding or my brother's latest crushes :D ;)  

And in return of this mechanical life, there is some monthly fixed amount that keeps coming in. Amount with which I can buy those expenses dresses which i never feel like buying anyways. Shopping, to some extent, irritates me on my own. Amount with which I can have some exotic cuisine in those french , italian resturants. But well, not all friends are available all the time, they have their own commitments, almost all the times ;)  ( my roomie, if by chance visit this link, is seriously going to kill me for this :P ) 

I just wonder at times, if the cost I am getting is seriously greater than the one I am paying for it ?  #signoff !!!

Mere begining !

New girl in the city. Well, after staying for more than 2 years in a city, I dont have the right to call myself new at all. But 'comparitively new girl in the city' won't suit at all.

Life is unexpected, and funny as well. I was 18 when I first visited this place with my parents. My dad was posted here for some months for an official assignment and we all came here for a short vaccation. Thats when I, oops, me and my mom, we both developed love for this city. Still remember those Tambram streets, that air force camp and that playground where my brother and me used to play cricket with other kids. That market where my mom used to go everyday to get flowers and stuff. Those T Nagar ice cream we used to bing on.

Even remember that sunday evening when we all were sitting at Marina beach where I could see a beautiful tall building. The beach and the building sparkling like diamond with those electrifing lights looked marvelous and charming altogether. And thats when I wished deep inside 'GOD! I MUST work here someday'.

Work for me was something else at that point of time. Not the kind of work I am doing right now :P I had plans of joining an NGO and then doing things for the betterment of society. Though, nothing has changed much even now. Thanks to 'Avvaya homes', a small group of educated people running orphanage and old-age home in Chennai. They are like a home away from home. Dreams will definately come true. I am just in that phase of empowering myself for some 2-3 years so that I can empower others later on.

But well, it was then, when that feel of being independent striked me somewhere. I was always more or less a dependent KIND OF kid since childhood. 'Kind of' because I was independent with my acts but permissions were granted from higher authorities - Maa & Paa ;) Not by choice though. Rather, it was more or less a need because of my dad's job and his posting in remote areas like Kashmir, Assam etc that made me and brother more of scheilded kids and my mom, an overprotective parent. Quite natural in a place where life started with al qaida and ended with hijbul mujahiddin :D

But the point is, at that point of time, when I was sitting @ the sea shore dreaming of my independence, somehow, Mr. GOD, for the first time in life, took my words, well really seriously. And here I am, in Besant Nagar: a suburb area of CHENNAI, named after one of the important members of Indian National Congress, Annie Besant. And well, this place has a beautiful beach n opposite to that is my flat, where I am writing this blog, less for others and more for myself. Well I have no clue about the audience of my blogs except one dedicated reader..Nishi :) n 2nd one..me n myself ;)

So, as I wished for some independence, it came to me, but with every good thing, comes the worst part hand in hand. Homesickness: especially when you are just too attached to your family, cooking food on your own, cleaning house, working , studying..as in everything on your own, is not as great as it appeals initially. There were times when I was directioneless, frustrated and told my parents to search a guy so that I can settle down. Then woke up my subconcious mind and asked if that is what I wanted from life. Being a techie is good but websites and newspapaers should not decide who is going to stand besides you in your good and bad times. And then said my concious mind, give time, things will change with time and I will get the one who is destined to be mine.

But life here is tough. real tough. And the worst part, you can not always show your loneliness to your parents, because once told, they will be much more worried than you are about it. Even though my parents will make sure to call me n number of times. 

But still 
at times, you need that warmth of your parent's touch and hug 
at times, you need your siblings to irritate you for those small lil things 
at times, you need your grand parents to talk to you for a while about their life 
And at times, you even need those chit chat silly stupid friends to gossip around 
P.S: How could i forget home cooked food btw :P I need so much of it. I can not cook anymore just for myself now :(

And I miss every bit of it. Though this place has given more than I ever asked for and taught me a lot about life. Though I definately love this city and the people here, more than my native. And though, for me, now its among one of the beautiful cities of the world, still, home is home. And I miss home. And on days when there are cyclones and chores.like today..I get scared and I miss my parents so much more :(

P.S: Nishi, Thanks for being a kind, patient and a true friend. And genuinely, thanks for tolerating me and my blogs. Waiting for your comments ;)

No Megha, Only Neha :-)

Its getting too difficult for me to connect to Megha. Although, in some cases, I definately do, but in future, its going to be difficult. I really don't know what to write. Tried to be Chetan Bhagat part 2 , but i guess, fiction is not my kind. And thank God i have realised this on time.

That sad and lonely image is too depressing for me to continue. And somewhere, she reminds of me, I mean a particular phase of my life, and I dont wanna experience that phase, even in stories, anymore.

But, hopes are still alive. Not being Chetan Bhagat means i can try to be Shobha De kind ;)

So, from this blog onwards, no Megha. Only Neha. And mind you,


Though I don't have those sad eyes
I still have a lot to write.
Tried my hands on fiction but realised
That its simply not my kind ;)
So welcome to my experiences with life
Where there is no room for dullness and only life will shine.
The stories may not be the way i tried
But they ll be one of their own kind.

PS: Hope that I succeed this time
Or I will seriously need a place to hide ;) :D


-Neha :))

Meet Megha, The Lady Herself

Weather was different today.  Quite different from what it used to be generally. The usual hot & humid trend of this urban yet simple coastal region was on a stroll. The sky was grey, deep grey. She peeped in from her window and the mesmerizing beauty failed to stop her from reaching upstairs. Terrace had always been her favorite hot spot. It had to be. After all, this place had seen her in grey, black & white. Terrace floor had everything, from her tears to her toes dancing on the tunes of some crazy numbers.

So, the terrace had her favorite child again. This time in a different shade altogether. She looked at the sky and mumbled ' Its beautiful today. Please god. Need some relief. It must rain today. That's it. ' Mr. sky was overwhelmed with this stubborn yet assertive, 25 years old lady wearing shades of blue and pleading desperately for those hardly visible tiny miny droplets.

It started raining. Monsoon's first rain it was, and no need to mention, it was as charmful as ever. She could actually feel, each and every droplet kissing her face. She looked happy, yet was sad. After a few micro seconds, her cheeks had a blend of tears and rain drops, that smudged together, well, really well.

Oh btw, enough oh she. Meet our lady in blue. Megha. A software engineer by profession, a freak by nature and a true nature lover by heart. A girl who is possessive about nothing else but LIFE and wanna make use of every bit of it. The new girl in a city. A city, where life starts at 4 in morning with rangoli at every doorstep and sleeps by 10pm after a heavy dinner of sambhar rice. A city, where its easy to remember a whole telephone directory but difficult to remember names of different gods & goddesses. A city, that's a threat, or at least, seems like a threat, to every North Indian, or a non South Indian precisely. A city, that's so simple and quite opposite to her native, Delhi, where life is all about showoff & show-on. The city she hated most, quite some time ago, but is totally, in love with it now. The city of Chennai.

New girl in the city, is nothing but story of a girl. A simple yet assertive one. A girl who is her parent's life and the way she tries to keep herself on the same roots her parents tought her before she left home for job. She, who gets scared easily, but is not coward at all. And the one, who knows, how to recollect herself and move on, even after breaking down into bits at times. A girl who is God's favorite child, yet, God never fails to give her those shocking surprises !!!